The world as I see it…

Just to clear something up…    I’d say I’m stuck.    ha

I went to this club last night (yeah – Sunday night…) called The Social.  This place was fairly decent…   the weather was a little cool, but it was great for meeting up with friends and such.  But the kicker of the night, it’s like midnight and I’ve had about 3 beers…   a little tipsy…   and I’m plowing through people trying to get to the bar to close out my tab and there’s this HUGE guy in my way.   Well, I’m a big guy, but this guy was huge… tall…   whatever.  He was facing away from me and I was just stuck.  So, I had to reach up to tap him on the shoulder to try to get him to move and he turns and looks at me, and it’s friggin’ Patrick Ewing.  wtf??  I didn’t get to say anything except “could I get through?” but that guy definitely cleared a path for me.     What a strange night.   clubbing on a Sunday evening with school the next day…   running into Patrick Ewing at the bar.  f***ed up s**t.

School will suck this week.  I have my lesson on Wednesday at 11 and supposed to play all of the 1st Bb trumpet part for Ein Heldenleben, the Eb part in the “Battle Scene”, lyric study no. 46, Charlier no. 7 and mvt. 3 of the Halsey Stevens.   Then I have wind ensemble 1-3 and at 3:30 playing mvt. 1 of the Halsey Stevens for trumpet class.   how the hell am I supposed to make it through that day?!   Maybe I would be better off practicing rather than sitting here and writing in my xanga?!   ah well…  I practiced yesterday.   

All I have to say is, Lizz rocks…   I didn’t mention this before, but the other day at Robbie’s she talked with me for a bit and said a lot of things that made me very happy.  I’m really glad she said those things because it always seems that whenever things in my life start falling apart, the next day things are lifted back up.  In this case, I didn’t expect a lot of those responses I got and wow…    …I’m just happy. 

Plus, Lizz and I are supposed to get together sometime to talk drill stuff…  hopefully have a drum corps video night some night next week.  We’re working on it.  It’ll be a lot of fun.   That reminds me…  I need to get working on some drill stuff…   It’s the “off season” still, but in a month or so, I’ll be starting some skecthes for some shows and by mid April, possibly start one or two school’s openers.

So, lets hear it for partying on a Sunday night and running into 7-foot tall retired basketball stars. 

So, it’s been a year…        and here I am.      …    that’s all I’ll say.

Anyway…   wow, what a long day today was.  I had a design meeting that lasted about 3 hours…   I think…  or so it felt like it was 3.  And we have yet to discuss flag designs and the props, etc.  But it’s gonna be a great show to design.  Very excited for the fall.

And lets hear it for me getting a new C trumpet!!  yay!  it’s silver and pretty and sounds good too.  Except it’s been difficult to get used to in wind ensemble…  heck, the guy that sits next to me called me out for playing too loud…   wtf?!   ah well.

So, yeah…  new horn…   new computer in a few months…  I hope.  And a new girl maybe? ha…  j/k   I really don’t talk much about that side of things on here like others do.  I did start my xanga-talk out with all that…   but I think I’m content with being a single guy.   And I have no reason to look for any romance in my future.   It always backfires on me and I think I’ve hurt others too much and hurt myself too much.  I’m not a good enough person to handle a relationship and I’m able to admit that.  :\  some people that know me might disagree with that statement, but my relationship history is my evidence.

Anyway, what now??  I can keep writing or I can get some food and snack while watching some TV.  I don’t know what to do right now.  I’m done for the day.  I really need to practice, but I just got done with 5 hours of lessons and I’m kinda shot.  I just have to not play so much in my lessons.   But these kids are young and have SO much potential.   And they need a good model sound…   luckily my sound is a lot better now than when I taught before.

Okay… I need a snack.  Thanks Joel and Lynn for your feedback.  I guess I could just reply to the comment section, but since y’all read this stuff anyway, I figured I’d just say it here. 

Joel – I wondered why I didn’t see you there.  Don’t sweat it though…  I hope you get to see me around again.

Okay…   time to actually get off my ass and eat something.  That’s one thing I forgot about when I used to teach a lot of lessons… I’d just teach 3-8 or whatever and forget to eat dinner.  ugh!

later!

I taught a Bluecoats brass camp yesterday…  boy that was fun.  I think we all had a great time and got a lot done.  Although, the recordings we made at the end didn’t come out the best, they still did a heck of a job in the few hours we spent together.

The music they’re playing is pretty kick ass.  I can’t say enough about Doug for what he’s been able to do with the arrangements for the corps over the years.  Maybe someday I’ll get to be a brass tech for a corps.  I talked about this to a few members yesterday, but I have always wanted to be a brass tech/caption head someday, but I’ve just been a real chicken to stick my foot in the door.  I finally did it this week and we’ll see what happens.

I’m tired. I need sleep.  Taylor, Brittany and Justin crashed at my place the other night.  It’s so much fun to have company over.   We watched some drum corps, obviously. 

I think I’d do well as a brass tech.  I just need to make some really tough decisions though.  I want to do a lot of things, but I can’t do everything I want to at the same time.  I wanna write drill for 10 bands and a drum corps.  Also be a brass tech or caption head for a corps.  Also be a band director.  And a professional trumpet player.  Teach lessons.  Teach marching camps.    …    …    or maybe I should just play Halo 24/7.  

Actually, I don’t even have an XBOX.  And I’m not good at Halo at all.  But it’s funny to go to Robbie and Jody’s and watch them all play.  They played until 6:30am the other night.  I crashed there unexpectedly (had a long day) and had to leave for class by the time they went to bed. 

Well, I’m glad people actually read my xanga.  I don’t judge whether they do or not based on just feedback, but it’s just hard to tell sometimes and I guess there’s a lot going on in my personal life that’s making me feel very alone.  And no matter who I get the chance to talk to at school or on the phone, my life still feels very empty.  And I can’t explain it.  This isn’t a cut on my friends and the people who care about me…  not trying to say they don’t mean anything to me.  They all do.  But it’s been hard to make it through the last 3 months…   and I’m having a very difficult time making decisions.  (any decisions).